MAINTAIN HEALTHY COMMUNICATION:
A healthy communication is very important in building a parent-child relationship. The child should always feel comfortable in sharing things with his/her parents. A free-flow communication is very essential in a mother-daughter relationship. A mother should act as a teacher, mentor and friend to her daughter. As the girl starts getting older, she needs acceptance and love from her mother. Never compare your daughter with others. This leads to a sense of insecurity in the child.
The thinking patterns of mother and daughter tend to differ due to generation gap. It is advisable that the mother sits down with her daughter to have discussions so that they can work on their differences. To aid with these open discussion moments it can be beneficial to set up a ‘Girl's Club’ where no topic is off-limits and no effects from what is discussed will be experienced. This gives your daughter a chance to experience what her friends are saying, gain access to the knowledge you have and provides an opportunity to know that you do not have all the answers. Share your own experiences with your daughter so that it opens the door to frankness and trust between you.
TALK OPENLY REGARDING NEGATIVE-STEREOTYPING
Freely discuss with your daughter how women are depicted in magazines, movies, internet etc. so that it enhances connection, builds self awareness and opens the door for some immense discussions. Few beauty commercials portray how their products prove to be a miracle in changing hair texture, removing blemishes, changing facial features etc. These commercials misguide females and also set them up to struggle for an unattainable version of beauty. Talking to your daughter about these things can help prevent several self esteem issues.
Talk to your daughter about the powerful role that women play in a family and society and how it helps in the building of a nation. Discuss with her the issues that women face in this male dominating society these days and the need of women emancipation. Talk to her about the role played by feminists in empowering women and helping them achieve their rights.
FOCUS ON ACCEPTING AND LOVING YOUR DAUGHTER THE WAY SHE IS
When you love someone unconditionally, you accept the way they are. You will not always agree with your daughter and at times may also dislike the way she is behaving. Being her mother, you have complete rights to provide correct guidance to your daughter and also set boundaries if required. Do this while still loving and accepting her.
Identify your responses to your daughter as she moves through different stages in her life. If required, enforce boundaries on her without turning violent and stay strong in your decisions. If it is not possible then give her the space she needs where she can make mistakes and live through the outcomes. You won’t always like the way she is behaving or the decisions she is making, but you should allow her the space so that she can fully live her experience without any fear of rejection from your side.
Invest your energy on your shared interests. Go to the spa together. Enjoy hair treatments, face-masks, pedicures, body-scrubs - all of which can be enjoyed in a very reasonable budget. Play a game, go for a walk or prepare a meal together. Search for things in which both of you can participate. Utilize this time to interact with your daughter about what is going on in her world and also share some of the experiences you remember from that time in your life. This is a great opportunity to connect and build something special.
When you spend time with your daughter and keep the communication open you will discover that your relationship will prosper and your guidance will play an effective role in her life.